As with many other sports, mixed martial arts has always had its fair share of cheaters who will try to get away with using performance-enhancing drugs in the hopes of gaining a competitive advantage in the cage.

However, when it comes to making up excuses for why they’ve failed a drug test, it’s fair to say that MMA fighters truly are in a league of their own.

As you’ll discover in the pages that follow, in MMA no excuse is too flimsy, too far-fetched, or frankly just too downright embarrassing not to be used in an attempt to convince people that this is all just a big mistake and their bulging biceps, limitless cardio and superhuman powers of recovery have nothing to do with a cocktail of illegal drugs surging through their system.

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Anderson Silva

The mixed martial arts world was rocked in 2015 by the news that arguably the greatest fighter of all time, Anderson Silva had tested positive for two anabolic steroids.

Silva was quick to protest his innocence, declaring that, “I always played clean, I was never a cheater,” and vowed to clear his name.

We all wanted to believe him, and several months his team confidently declared that he would be cleared at an upcoming Nevada State Athletic Commission hearing.

MMA fans waited with baited breath in the hope that this had all just been a big misunderstanding, only to discover that the best his legal team could come up with was that he’d unwittingly taken a tainted love potion.

The ludicrous story that unfolded during the hearing was that Silva had been given this mysterious sexual enhancement medication (originating from Thailand and housed in an unlabeled blue vial) by a friend, and had consumed it for three months prior to his fight without ever stopping to question whether it was above board or not.

If that wasn’t comical enough, an ingenious fan managed to hack into NSAC’s speakerphone system during the hearing and played hits including, Salt N Pepa’s – ‘Let’s Talk About Sex’, 2 live Crew’s – ‘Me So Horny,’ and Shaggy’s – ‘It Wasn’t Me’, which had even the commissioners struggling to stifle their laughter.

Needless to say NSAC didn’t believe a word of his defense, and Silva would be hit with a one year suspension as well as a $360,000 fine.